By Michael Karlo Lim
MONDAY, November 28, 2017 Porky has always hated Mondays.
He decided not to get up for it today. He was a sleeper and quite the heavy one, too, that it was entirely out of the ordinary to see him awake and engaged. Snoring being a given among pugs, Porky’s was unusually loud and made up a considerable part of this residence’s white noise. At times he’d fall rather silent, and it was our household’s sick joke to check if he was still breathing during what became weird lulls. The joke was on us this morning. I bet he’s laughing heartily with that wheezy laugh of his now.
Porky Pug, died peacefully in his sleep without any apparent preceding illness or distress at the age of 63 dog years at his home in Talisay City.
He was adopted by his hooman, Michael Karlo, in 2010. Porky was quite the wide-eyed fellow — a loving reference to his congenital proptosis — and also an unconventional beauty, even by pug standards. His fearsome visage never betrayed the fact that he would never make a good guard dog. While his primary occupation is accumulating shuteye, he sometimes enjoyed a good run around the yard however brief, chasing his tail, dragging his itchy butt across the floor and giving this writer the heebie-jeebies with 3AM solo howlfests on a deadline night. With the insatiable urge to mark his territory, not just limited to the non-living, Porky was able to establish strong relationships with everyone his pee came in contact with. Age later made him increasingly standoffish, and he would often only return affectionate gestures with dismissive snorts. This was not without remedy as he can be swayed by confit pork belly… pinakupsang baboy. He carries his ever-burgeoning Rubenesque figure effortlessly, if he does move at all, and maintains it with his love for various meats and treats.
Porky leaves behind his hooman, his other hooman, ThePussyKat; a son, Beefy; a grumblemate, Baecan, plus three unnamed hamsters our errant zookeeper, Gideon, failed to return to from an extended leave of absence.
Porky was immediately buried in the garden with a short ceremony attended only by the family members present.
The dog days are over. Sleep tight, old boy. Sleep tight.