Alternative living: Home makeovers on a shoestring

Text: Micah Almazan

THERE’S something so utterly boring about the subject of real estate. Admit it. I immediately think of brokers who dress up like they’re licensed but talk like they’re not. It’s only fun to those who have the financial capacity to hunt, buy, and decorate their chosen house or condo.

Alright, fine. I’m only talking like this because I do not have the luxury of thinking about acquiring my own property just yet. I’m sure many of you are on the same boat. So for those of us who can’t think big at the moment, we can always start small and focus on what we can do now like sprucing up our own bedroom. Think of it as a sneak peek into your future bachelor pad or “independent woman” loft — whatever that means.

These are just a few cheap or alternative ways to give your bedroom a bit of a makeover:

1. Clean.

It won’t cost you anything except a little sweat or back pain depending on your age. Aside from all the dust and dirt you can’t believe you lived with for so long, you’d be surprised to discover old stuff you had long forgotten about; like your journal when you were 16. *cringe*

2. Make an artist fall in love with you.

If they’re head-over-heels crazy for you, that’s free art for your room. This method is a tad bit extreme, but not impossible. (It’s most effective if you love them back, though; don’t be a prick.)

3. Make your own art.

If you’re a gifted artist yourself, get your hands dirty and see if your creative self-expression can enhance your room or not. If not, see number 2.

4. Be predictable. Buy a succulent.

Just one succulent, because the minimalist look is still cool. I think.

5. Pinterest. Duh.

You’ll find a ton load of more helpful tips there actually. I don’t know why you’re still reading this.

6. Repaint.

Nothing transforms your space more than a fresh new color. If it’s bright now, go with something darker, or vice versa. It might have a positive effect on your temperament, you’ll never know. (Finally something useful, right?)

7. Add space.

Prop up a large mirror that lets you see your fabulous body from head to toe. It’s a classic interior designer’s trick to create more space. This only works if you don’t have an active imagination that lurks in the dark. I mean, it has the potential to be creepy if you think about it.

8. Throw in a rug.

Adding a small rug as an accent will make a huge difference. It will add warmth to your space, as well as dust too actually. But if you’re a religious cleaner (see number 1), it shouldn’t be a problem. #Aladdinfeels

9. Re-imagine.

Do you need a side table, but don’t really have the money to buy a new one? If you have any lying around, use a chair instead! It’ll work just as well as any side table as long as the surface is flat. If it’s not, it’s okay too. I’m sure you’ll work something out if you want it bad enough. #what

10. Be on the lookout…

…for sale season! So you can buy anything you want like new linens, curtains, etc. This way, you’ll save yourself the trouble of having an artist fall for you, since you can buy your own art from the mall. It’ll be lame, no doubt, but spending money is better than spending feelings. #whatpart2

I hope you at least learned something from this. There isn’t much to dive into, but sometimes in life, you gotta find your own meaning and make do with what you have — especially when you’re on a budget tighter than your asshole. On that note, happy decorating!