Kurt & Barbs: Cereal killers

Michael-Karlo-LimMichael Karlo Lim
Pornografeed

MY suspicions that Barbra Sia and Kurt Famador are psychopaths have always been there from the very first time I’ve met them. They are butchers to begin with and own an establishment primarily dedicated to the preparation and consumption of meat. The hallmarks are there: a fetish for knives, disregard for convention, interest in anatomical physicality, partialism (cheek and jowl are high on their list) and the fascination with fire.

It has been quite masochistic on my part to have returned time and again to Carnivore for their brand of pleasurable torture. Assortments of animals are cut and used from nose to tail. There are the exotics and the tame usual’s, the latter made like the former with extensive treatments before I am stuffed with these. Hansel was fed well for the intended oven. Here I am swallowing hook, line and sinker. Patty Hearst would have been proud. I am slayed every single time and am reborn wanting more.

Chef Barbs Sia
Chef Barbs Sia

A year after I was drawn into this macabre affair, I was invited to join two feasts, on separate dates two weeks apart, with the rest of their submissives to mark their sordid beginning and our willing capture. They were joined by one of The Island’s founders of the cult of craft beer, The Cebruery, pairing sweet liquid poisons with the solid. Here is my recollection of the second installment.

The second installment began with veg to ease us into another five-courser. Beets were oven-roasted soft, stewed in orange juice, peel, ginger, vinegar and select herbs. These were served in thin slices with Feta, Navel Orange Supremes, Edible Mums and flowers and dressed with a reduction of the stew. The more vegetal tastes were drowned out with the oranges playing up the sweetness and its tang coming up to that of the Feta. The tartness of the Gose brought out the sweet earthiness of the dish.

Whiskey-Smoked Bone Marrow with Uni served with Toasted Baguette Slices
Whiskey-Smoked Bone Marrow with Uni served with Toasted Baguette Slices

The first surprise dish came by a roasted, split-bone, in-bone Marrow finished with a cold smoke of Whiskey wood. Uni and toast came into play with this dish as in the first dinner. The prezo included a popsicle stick embedded in the fatty bone tissue as a butter knife of sorts.

In another day-long treatment, Octopus was slow-cooked to a near scallopine softness. The luxuriously meaty texture rested on flavor contrast alternates of salty local Chorizo slices and the blank canvas of New Potatoes married by the Butter Crunch Pesto. Again, the Weiss comes in to bring out the sweetness of the seafood with its contrast of sours.

Beet Carpaccio and Liepzig-Style Gose
Beet Carpaccio and Liepzig-Style Gose

The Cebruery’s Brown-eyed Girl, an Oud Bruin, came in as an in-between with the second surprise dish of Beef Shortrib with a nine-hour Demi-glace and a Deep-Fried Goat Testicle. The shortrib was savory and their usual sous-vide soft. That offal piece wasn’t at all awful and only more strange to the thought than it was to the tongue with a texture more dense than but not too unlike a scallop crossed with a boiled jackfruit seed and a taste along that same approximation. Frying made it golden. The malty and sweet flavors of the Brown Ale are enriched by the beef while its dark and roasty character cut through the more exotic taste.

Slow-cooked Octopus and Classic Berliner Weiss
Slow-cooked Octopus and Classic Berliner Weiss

I expected a more gamey taste and a bit more than the usual chew with the unusual meat choice of Water Buffalo but was surprised with a flavor most comparable to an intense Angus. Local Buffalo Cheese lent a more exotic tang and mouthfeel than the usual processed cheese in the Ciabattini slider. Stark without the addition of any sauces and vegetables, the meat and cheese took center stage with myself wanting an encore. The rather hoppy ale helped balance out the intense flavor.

Slow-cooked Goat Leg with Striploin in Curry with New Revolution Double IPA
Slow-cooked Goat Leg with Striploin in Curry with New Revolution Double IPA

Sous-vide made the huge difference as goat striploin came up yielding and even light in flavor and color with nary the usual strong goat smell. A potent Curry Sauce gave it good heat and spice flavor that well with the subdued goat flavor. The beer catches the caramelization’s of the meat and boosts the umami. While the hops cool the heat from the spice the alcohol content reins in the effect to keep the bite distinct.

Beef Shortrib with Demi-glace and a Deep-Fried Goat Testicle with Brown-eyed Girl
Beef Shortrib with Demi-glace and a Deep-Fried Goat Testicle with Brown-eyed Girl

Two surprise dishes brought the advertised five-course to seven which pushed dessert to the edge of needless but who were we to say no. Chocolate and banana is always a winner and here it’s more an adult ala mode dessert with the more intense dark chocolate and the liqueur. All the alcohol in Kahlua may have cooked off but the flavors lingered in the creamy concoction. The Fat Bottomed Girl-Wee Heavy Scotch Ale extends the caramel, chocolate and coffee notes.

Dark Chocolate and Banana Cake with Kahlua Ice Cream
Dark Chocolate and Banana Cake with Kahlua Ice Cream

I write this in the state of food coma. I am still reeling from those sensational experiences and wallowing in the individual memories of each of my tastebuds. My suspicions that Barbra Sia and Kurt Famador are psychopaths have always been there from the very first time I’ve met them. If death be this delicious then let me die a thousand deaths by their hands.

Water Buffalo Sliders with People Power Pale Ale
Water Buffalo Sliders with People Power Pale Ale

Carnivore is located at The Gallery, John Paul II Ave., Mabolo, Cebu City

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